The morning of January 23rd started out with a heap of shame. My mom had reminded me of a care clinic in town called Mercy Children’s Clinic. They provide care to ALL individuals. So I called to make an appointment as both Will and Sadie were sick. I had to share our story 4 times between leaving our pediatrician to get my medical records and registering with Mercy. As I hung up the phone to get everyone ready to go to the doctor’s appointment I hung my head to pray. God’s voice declared to me, “I am growing your compassion.” I laughed at the time and said, “Yes, Lord, you are.” See there was so much shame in no longer having health insurance and not being able to afford healthcare. And having a husband that could not find a job.
When I arrived at the office I filled out the pile of paper work and then meet with the doctor. She said, “I see that you are new with us today. How did you learn about Mercy?” I went into my story about our situation and our need for medical care. I don’t know what it was about her, but I just began to weep. In this calm voice, she said, “We don’t care what you have or don’t have or how you got here. We are just glad you came. You have nothing to be ashamed of. People give to you not because you are needy. They do it because they love you.” They felt like direct words from God. I realized at that point two important lessons.
Was that people were giving to us not because they had pity on me. It was because they LOVED us. They gave for the same reasons I give. To love, encourage, and energize hope.
That I did not have a heart for people that were in need. That not all need was created out of our own failures, but that need had many colors, shapes, and designs.
This started me on a path to now know that throughout all of God’s judgment is God’s compassion. When He grows compassion, you no longer just see a sinner, but you see a person desperate for a Savior. Compassion is the opposite heart condition of judgment. Compassion opens the heart to see yourself in the other person’s sin. Equal people desperate for a Savior.
That same day Nate heard more discouraging news on the job front. He was sad, angry, and full of fear. As he prayed, God spoke to him, “I’ve got this”. So by the end of the day we put the kids to bed and just sat like lumps on the couch. Then (READ THE CARD)…….
The Story: We were downstairs and our front doorbell rang. People that “know us” come to the side door. I pulled aside the curtain to see a young woman standing there. Through our glass door she asked, “Are you Nate?” I answered “Yes” and she said, “I have a gift for you.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small envelope covered in writing. I barely managed a thank you before she was back in her car and driving off. I have never seen this woman before and she just handed us a very generous gift. So thankful for a God who cares for us and a people who listen to the prompting of His Spirit. The words on the envelope are beautiful and could not be more timely!”
As I recounted the story to friends over the next few days God gave me these words to share,
“God’s Provision is Perfect. Perfect in both its quantity and timing. It is never too little or too much and it is not early and never late. And this provision is usually thought of as monetary, and it is, but it is also Spiritual, Physical, Emotional, and Monetary!”
See we had seen God provide for our hearts. He continued to give us his words and make the words of the bible come alive. He provided clothing for our kids (bags just showed up at the door), books they desired (book fair books we could not afford), and food for us to eat (someone had an extra ham during Thanksgiving and gave it to us). He provided comfort for our fear and gave us joy on the darkest of days. He brought us to mind with our praying friends and gave them words to encourage us, to remind us, and spur us on our journey. And clearly he was providing for us monetarily.