“The silence is KILLING me!!!!” Is what I wrote in my prayer journal – God has gifted me with doing things, completing actions, follow through – NOT “Be still and know that I am God.” I noted, “We are feeling desperate to move into the journey that You are guiding us to, we are standing with palms open ready to walk into any scarifies this might entail, we are ready to GO!!!” And yet it was silent. Then Nate read me these verses, “Be strong and let your heart take courage, All you who wait for the Lord.” Psalms 31:24
On Jan. 12th I read these verses and they quickly became my life verse, “Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.”
2 Cor. 4:16
These months had been long. But we have never lost sight of hope. I fully believed the top of this mountain would be marvelous….I could see flowers among the weeds…I had seen sores that had healed and new ones revealed….My feet had labored and I’d sat and cried….I feel that I was nearing my end. I could see where one pain had lead into another God revealing, glorious pain, I understood emotional vulnerability, I knew Satan’s voice of shame, fear, and judgment, I got what it meant to trust your husband, I saw giving as humbleness, I had grown in my faith of provision, I knew this was temporary….
As Nate and I sat at the kitchen table for our business meeting. We invited the Lord to sit with us and He was very present. We talked about our banking accounts, what our timing needed to look like, how to wisely move about financially, and felt His ever-pressing confirmation in us to “Remain Where You Are”. So we did.