Some of these will be funny, all will be facts, and some might make you think!!!!

1. All toilets have a long and a short flush. Dependent on how long one sits may determine which flush one uses!
2. Germans linger at the table…always. They never rush a meal and will sit and chat for hours.
3. Germans work hard and rest well. The government mandates that EVERONE gets 22 days of vacation (not to be used at maternity leave as you get more time for that)!
4. If one choses he can stream and watch live an AR, TN, or USC game.
5. German’s like to rebuild old things. Was it destroyed during the war? No problem. Was it an old DDR apartment? No problem. But if you listen you will hear the Spirit say,”I do not care about new paint. I am doing a new thing!”
6. German’s like big words. I.e. Naturlichesmineralwasser. This word is ‘natural water’ folks!
7. Outside of Phil Collins Germans are not known for their singing. Beer chants, yes, general singing, no.
8. In Potsdam kids as young as 6 ride public transit alone. To school, to home, to a friends, family in Berlin…they just get on and ride!
9. On the sidewalks is both the walking lane and bike lane…one should ALWAYS pick wisely or one will be smushed!!!! (Or get a dirty look and spoken to in stern Deutsch)
10. When in a bakery if you would like to order a black and white cookie you order ‘An American’. Y’all I can’t make this stuff up!!!
11. If you go to the grocery store with a German and find strange colored chew things in the baking isle and ask,”what are these?” She will respond,”YUCK! Those are used at Christmas in a bread…um?” And you say,”oh, in fruit cake?” She will say,”Yes!” And you will both agree that disdain for fruit cake is universal.
12. Toilet paper in the US is in squares. In Germany it is in rectangles. If you are a wadder, no problem, if you are a folder, it throws you all off!
13. Germans are very punctual. If you miss communicate with them they will call every other German they know looking for you. If they still can’t find you they will call Katharina. If they call Katharina they will declare,”All I can say right now is that the Americans are lost!!!!” Good thing we had just placed our phone in our coat pocket, hung it on the wall, and missed the 9 phone calls and text messages.
14. When you own a bike and you have to go up an escalator you just take it with you. (I learned that holding the bike break helped it not to roll back into the people behind you!)

And finally:

15. If you teach a large group of Germans the Country Electric Slide make sure you say “slide” clearly. Other wise one might think you said,”electric slut”. And when you can’t understand them saying the word “slut” they will use the word “bitch”. And when they say that you start laughing so hard they think they are saying that wrong so they repeat “electric bitch” to you two more times!!!

The Non Spiritual Things I learned in Germany

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